Global Domination

S(crap)s: Acid Elephant / Meadows End / Mother Of Millions / Obzerv / Oruga / Speedblow / Zeugen Der Leere

23/05/14  ||  Global Domination

Acid Elephant: Star collider

Lord K: 5 songs, an hour’s worth of playing time and something about it gets my head nodding in approval. Be warned: drugs are involved here. 5

Cobal: It took off nicely but it ended up going nowhere and with too much time-consuming noise. Original as this may be, I was expecting better. 5

Habakuk: Extremely chilled-out, lengthy dope fuzz. Pretty good, but the vocals could be a tad better. 7

sincan: Shit, that acid is on much elephant! A trunk full of drugs. 6

The Duff: A bit Queens of the Stoneage, Smashing Pumpkins, drone, Kyuss, Eyehategod. Bowie and early-Jonas Renske vocals, all with that Beck-too-casual feel, or the track “Cannon Ball”, 90s grunge-dress-me-down, fuck me in the ass and call my expression unchanged; I’m not nuts about this, the production is demo quality, but desert-stoner-don’tgiveafuck has some appeal, I guess, for the untaxed mind. 5

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Meadows End: The sufferwell

Lord K: Happy times carnival metal incoming! Spiced up with something that is supposed to make them “brutal”, though it doesn’t really work in the context of things, not with these cheap sounding keyboards everywhere. 4

Cobal: Unlike most symphonic metal out there, this isn’t weak. While not excellent, there’s some quality music here. 6,5

Habakuk: If I had an evil twin into melodic death metal, he would dig this. 6

sincan: I did suffer well. 5

The Duff: Synth-metal for the My Dying Bride fan; only Opeth and Insomnium do growls and depression. 4

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Mother Of Millions: Human

Lord K: You can’t name an album “Human” unless your band is Death. This ambitious shit’s got some potential, it’s a shame it’ll take years before they achieve its full status though. 5

Cobal: NO!!! 3

Habakuk: Promising intro…yeah, and that’s that. Faster guys, faster. 4

sincan: The vocals and everything needs more bangbang de la powah. What the fuck did I just write, must’ve been the fucking elephant on acid. 5

The Duff: More synth metal. Goddamn it – quite an average production, what if bad Soilwork were worse, and met with recent The Ocean and Pantera? And then the dude tried to sing like James Maynard Keenan. Demoralising. 3

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Obzerv : Obzerv

Lord K: It feels like 90% of the bands today that you never heard of got into the studio way too early. It feels unfinished and rushed. Obzerv’s another one of those who fit that bill and their brand of metal is absolutely uninteresting. 3

Cobal: From annoying to boring and back again. Fuck it. 3

Habakuk: A little constipated and not very enticing altogether. 4

sincan: Hardcore vocals can mostly hit the axe. Premature? Yes. 4

The Duff: Very uninspired, a lot of screaming. I can’t find a riff. 2

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Oruga: Blackened souls

Lord K: Doom/stoner that does nothing for me. 3

Cobal: I fail at finding what this is about other than slow beat and shouting. I’ll pass. 3

Habakuk: Either I have the attention span of a four-year-old, or this is a little boring. Or both. 5

sincan: French sludge that is decent but fails to deliver the last drops of manjuice. 6

The Duff: Early Neurosis, Cult of Luna and Mastodon, deep, dark, beautiful; Bobbi Starr’s anus. Love this. Will masturbate later. 8,5

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Speedblow: Behold the darkness

Lord K: Yes, this blows alright. 2

Cobal: Everybody enjoys fast blowjobs… 6

Habakuk: Little speed and a lot of blow. 5

sincan: Speedblower: The ability to incredible fast blow a little something. 5

The Duff: Not very good; speed metal with all the tricks, little feel, odd flashes of talent. Probably foreign, I don’t know why there are still bands playing this music. 4

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Zeugen Der Leere: Seelenwanderer

Lord K: We round off this edition with some blackish metal. Zugen Zugen is not sucking it completely, but that doesn’t mean they are any good. 4

Cobal: Almost there. The music TV channel friendly parts ruined it for me. 5

Habakuk: German lyrics and black metal do not mix. I just don’t want to understand this. 4

sincan: Another decent black metal band. Skip the cheap melodic parts and… write better songs. 5

The Duff: This album is about 1h20 or something, fucking crazy; depresso-goth + keys and even a bit of electro Ibiza-style, God-awful, a bit of folk, black, a lot of melody.. growled vocals, high, mighty and raspy. Musically they are creative, I just can’t get on board for the multitude of ways they are attempting to make me cry. These guys are probably big early Green Carnation fans. 5

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